Why does weight loss have to be so much harder than weight gain?!? Temptations seem to far outnumber inspirations! I have strayed off-track again. I find that I am actually craving french fries and ice cream so badly that it feels like a physical withdrawal from an addiction. I have been blaming it on so much lately...the Holidays, PMS, TOM, depression... I just always seem to find myself in these slumps!!! I hate this!! How in the hell did I get to this point in my life?!? How did I lose myself beneath an 80 pound layer of cellulite?!?! How do I keep myself on the "straight and narrow"? I have been reading so many of the NS Daily Doses as well as the other blogs that I am into. There are so many others out there like me, yet I still feel like I am alone at times and that I can't do this! Then, there is the real clincher in my warped mental justification: People like me, why the hell should I give a damn about my weight?!? I'm in decent condition health wise with no diseases or internal effects of my excess weight, why should I change?!? Despite all my attempts to improve my mental attitude toward my weight loss, I still find myself struggling everyday not to eat everything in site!!!
Okay, new strategies are obviously in order!! I have got to find some sort of daily (or even hourly; hell, minute by minute for that matter) affirmation or inspiration to revert to in my times of weakness and struggle.
Oh and I have just had a brainstorm!!! I saw this on another blog I visited recently. I have to put everything in writing. I have to make a commitment to myself and the only way that I can do that is to create a contract that includes a specific plan for my GMC. (G oal M otivation C onflict)
Goal To reach a weight of 156 pounds by New Year's Day 2008.
Motivation To feel better about myself. To be a healthy role model for my daughter. To have more energy. To be able to buy cute clothes. To avoid any future health risks.
Conflict General laziness and unwillingness. Too many tempting opportunities resulting from lack of planning. Little support at home. Depression. Self-conscientiousness about public knowledge of my dieting. Feeling as though it would just be better to not try than to fail.
Geez, I have issues! The next thing I have to do is to come up with ways to remind myself of what I am striving for. I am considering some inspirational quotes to display around those weakest areas of my life. My office, my fridge, my car even could use some up-lifting sentiments. I have also thought about printing some of these quotes on address labels that I could then stick to things like my debit card or credit cards. That way when I go to whip it out at McDonald's there would be a happy little message of hope for me right there. I am still working on converting my urges for food into urges for exercise, but that is so difficult. I haven't been able to find a sincere appreciation for exercise yet!! I am open to any other suggestions...
And finally, I have to decide on some sort of reward system. A motivation to help keep me on track. Something that I yearn for more than those fries or that jamocha shake. I have to look deep inside myself for something that I would be willing to seriously work for.
Once I have done all this, I will write it up in contract form and sign it. I will then have my hubby and maybe even my mom witness it for me. I am hoping that if I lay out my precise plan, my family may find it easier to support my program. I might even be able to find a way to include him and motivate him to do the same!!! Then, I can post copies of this contract in visible areas or my home and office as a reminder of goal and it's impending prize.
I will work on this today and post it tomorrow!
3 comments:
I totally agree with you Kellie! I quit smoking 3 years ago and I believe that weight loss is WAY harder! It's the hardest thing I have ever done! I've also felt the urge to give up and order myself a loaded pizza, stuff my face and carry on with life! But something deep inside me is pushing me to carry on with the weight loss and a small part of me actually thinks my goal is attainable and maintainable!! It can be done, think of it as traveling through the mountains .... you finally reach the top of the first mountain just to see that there are many more you need to climb! ? You just have to get over the hump.
I think your idea of putting motivational messages on items is a great idea ! I especially like the idea of putting one on your debit card! Maybe like "Do you REALLY want it??" When ever I feel like I'm craving something I try and occupy myself in other ways first (I like to cross- stitch or scrapbook) and hopefully I'll forget about it but if the craving doesn't go away then maybe you should treat yourself to a small bite? But if you have your treat then maybe promise yourself to do 10 sit ups? Good luck Kellie! :)
I have the same problems. It just seems so helpless sometimes.
I've got to find my motivation.
It IS tough, Kellie, but I know you can do it! It may not always be perfect, but you can do it!!
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